Brethren, hard times are upon us. The reality of the harsh economic condition in the country is hitting everybody, one way or the other. There is a general angst among the entire Nigerian populace. This annoyance, understandably, is toward the government. But the government is only seen on the pages of Newspapers; so we tend to take it out on ourselves. I blame Buhari for all this. Don’t know if I should blame him though, but everybody seems to be doing that right now. Besides, it feels kinda good having someone to blame.
I came back from lecture yesterday to meet my Landlord asking for the remainder of my rent. And I’m like: ‘Oga, I just paid you half of the money last 2 weeks na.’ I almost asked him for loan.
They say it is the dollar. Asked the woman at the Buka why her soup is smaller than usual the other day. She responded by asking me if I haven’t heard that dollar has added money.
In these dire times, survival is key.
Below are a few survival tips. Call them Life Hacks if you may. This is especially handy if you live off-campus. For Hostel dwellers, a concise list is posted on the Notice board at Senate building. I cannot guarantee the success of all the solutions below, but then, a trial will convince you.
Register Your Sim
One of the things we need most as students is call credit. And there has never been a better time to need airtime than now. You need to be in constant touch with home; to keep checking if the coast has cleared enough to send you reinforcements. Unfortunately, MTN has caught wind of the trouble in paradise; hence they no longer allow customers borrow credit at the moment. The best way to avoid spending money on airtime is to (re)register your sim card. If you haven’t heard, you get free credit of up to N20000 for calls and sms upon registration. You can even buy and register two or more cards if you so wish.
Raise Your Cup
In case you don’t know, a satchet of pure water is sold for 20 Naira here. If water is your favorite drink like it’s mine, you could be spending a whooping 100 naira on water alone, daily.
In order to minimize your spending on water in these austere times, all you need do is turn the water into a cup before you drink. Here’s the trick: Pouring the water into a cup makes you regulate the amount of water you take at each particular time. A satchet of water is usually bigger than your average cup. This means you would have to drink a satchet of water two separate times. Such joy.
No Place Like Home
This part is very important for the guys. When next you are tempted to enjoy your favorite Buka, think of how much you can achieve by carrying a food flask along. I have a theory that there is increased chances of getting a bigger plate of food if you buy take-away than there is when you eat-in. All you need do is buy extra white balls for additional use.
Walk The Talk
One of the comforting things about our current predicament is that bike fares haven’t been affected…yet. However, it would still be a good idea if one saves for rainy days. So, instead of biking to and fro(m) school every day, you may want to trek either of the two laps. All you need do is have your earphones firmly fixed to your ears. This lightens the weight of the journey. It also gives the impression that you are engrossed in whatever is playing in your ears. Make sure you don’t walk too briskly. You don’t want to arrive lecture all wet with sweat.
Correct and constant application of the steps above would sure help in no small measure, in these hard times. Don’t forget to thank me later. Besides, what are friends for?
The list will be updated as the condition worsens